Get Out of Jail, Go Directly Home, Do Not Pass Skybar
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I promised myself that I would never publicly acknowledge the fact that I pay attention to news regarding Paris Hilton. OK I am outing myself, dernit! Hope everyone is happy. Yes, I am a loser; I occasionally visit dlisted.com. I can't help it. Dang.
Anyhoo in this case it's hard to miss this morning's news that Paris was released from jail due to an "unspecified medical problem". She had been behind bars just three days. WTF (what the flip)?
Hmmm, I wonder... If I were busted for DUI, and subsequently drove my car without a license -- and got busted for that, and then violated my probation which resulted in me being sentenced to jail time... I wonder if I could get myself sent home because I had a tummy ache? |
Paris is now under house arrest for 40 days. Yes! Way to go Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department. That'll learn her. I am pretty sure it went down something like this:
Paris: Like, I couldn't even finish my baloney sandwich last night and I'm sorta PMS-ing and everything. I don't feel so hot.
LCSD: OK well -- well uh...you're in big trouble missy! Have your driver take your butt home to your mansion. Your personal chef is gonna be busy because I want you to stay there for the next 40 days. Sit by the pool and think about what you've done. Bad dog.