Product dis-Placement

Cameron — Sat, 21 Oct 2006 00:52:00 GMT

Pop Quiz. What do the following three items have in common?

The answer in a minute. But first I have to tell a little story. So I was at the pharmacy yesterday. It's in a grocery store whose name I won't mention, but evidently it's the way to go if you want to be safe. It is also the pharmacy to visit if you cannot stand people smiling at you or acknowledging you with eye contact. No frivolous pleasantries here baby.

Maybe it's the stuffy neighborhood they're in. I dunno. All I do know is these employees are the most unhappy people you will ever see dispensing drugs. Never a smile in the place. I'm lucky to get eye contact. I've been going there for two years and it's always the same. They must be under constant suicide watch or something. Oh and did I mention...they...are...slowwwww.

But I'm getting ahead of myself here. So I go into my unfriendly neighborhood pharmacy yesterday to pickup a script--that I had phoned in last week. Was it ready? Ummm...survey says: nope! The sad, no-eye-contact cashier girl slouched over to review the situation with the non-smiley, mumbler pharmacist who frowned and pointed at some monitor and looked at a paper and said something like waitthereandI'llfillit.

Kewl. Fine. I'm a patient guy, no biggie. The organic isle (my favorite) starts parallel to where the pharmacy ends. So I browsed down the isle and back. Nice work, killed two minutes. Now, the adult diaper isle also starts perpendicular from where the pharmacy ends. So I being the dork that I am, well I start to browse the shelves of Depends and Serenity products, and--hello! Guess what I saw hanging between the Depends Adjustable and the Depends Super Plus Absorbency? Guess!

You know what I'm talking about right? Those little impulse item thingies the supermarkets hang on the shelves. Like maybe you're in the ice cream isle and they have some scoopers hanging or maybe you're in the bath isle and they have some shower scrubbies or pumice stones. I dunno. Anyhoo in the Stupidway adult diaper isle...they're tie-in impulse product is -- wine openers! Yup. Hanging right between the Depends Adjustable and Super Plus Absorbency...you can get your sommelier on with a waiter-style corkscrew. That cracks me up! Stinkway is apparently targeting alcoholics that are too wasted to use the bathroom. But Sideway's poor product placement didn't end there. Next to the corkscrews (also between the Depends Adjustable and Super Plus Absorbency) is a display of mini bikini shavers^±. 3-pack dude, bonus! There must be a total doofus running that pharmacy I tell ya. A sad doofus.

± Actual mini bikini razors not shown because I didn't have my camera with me and I couldn't find them anywhere online.

Leafy Blower Dudes

Cameron — Wed, 05 Apr 2006 19:35:00 GMT

Why on a super windy day like today does ASU's Grounds Services break out the leaf blowers. Every morning I pass 2-3 blower dudes* as I walk into campus at the north end of Cady Mall. Sure enough, today was no exception. I passed two of 'em. Do they hose down their driveways while it's raining? :-P

* Ya I say "dudes" a lot. I also say "doofus", "nice", "you rock" (thanks to rollerderbygirl) and "tpptttt!". Well, truth be told I type "thppttt!". But I do say the other things.

And while we're at it...I refer to my cats as "dogs" and I call horses "puppies". It's all done in a good nature. I consider myself intelligent, well-read, healthy schmelthy, blah blah, etc. But yes, I say "dude".Dude.

Cameron Scholtz's Blog : Rant, Silliness

Product dis-Placement

Leafy Blower Dudes